Lovers or Friends - GirlsBestFriendandCoBlog

Lovers or Friends


How do we distinguish the boundaries between lovers and friends?
Directly we express that neither party is ready for a relationsip. Yet ,everything you seem to do with and for another are relationship related. We try to keep a distance, but as one pulls away, the other pulls you back. Feelings are intertwined and later led to confliction. “Boundaries” and “limits” of a friendship are once again crossed. Then it goes back to what the mutual agreement was: to just be friends, not do things on a relationship level, not to catch feelings, not to get clingy. But back to reality: you see one another way too often. Meet one another’s closest friends and family. Tell past experiences, and simply too much of you to the other. Become unintentionally clingy, have sex and now feelings are involved. more – <!-more->
By this time our heart speaks louder than our brain. Telling us its ok to love this person. So how are we so sure that the other person has that mutual feeling of love? We don’t know and as a result another heart is broken.

The solution: Give it space, time and some distance. Falling in love alone is not a fun feeling. Spare your feelings as well as the other person’s.
Don’t have ANY expectations. Expectations only lead to disappointment. Would you rather be cautious of your heart or allow yourself to fall into something that just ISN’T what it seems?

Because I’m hurting. The kind of hurt that won’t let me distinguish the difference between a friendship and a relationship. I’m falling. Her actions seems as if she is. Her (not often spoken) words tell me another. So is this just her being friendly? A friend? Is this a friendship? Because my heart is being put on the line. They say you can’t help how you feel. Well unfortunately I might be feeling by my lonesome.
So now what? I’ve given time, energy, patience, space, love and effort. Yet I’m caught between what I would like to be a relationship and what is clearly a friendship with benefits. Feelings, bonds and what we’ve built are now on the line because I can’t distinguish the difference between friends and lovers.

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2 Replies to Lovers or Friends

  1. Davonna Lee says:

    The confliction between the label of being a “lover” or “friend” exist because of the lack of communication between two individuals who aren’t ready to commit.. The potential for a successful relationship is seen between the two, but the hesitation to ask for what you want out of each other is readily mentioned based on the level of communication you’ve had with past relationships..To have clarity in a relationship, both parties must have confidence and trust with one another and be willing and comfortable to express the expectations or boundaries in the relationship without feeling as though their request are inappropriate or not well-worth the share..

  2. Valentin says:

    Thanks for that nice article ! See you.

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